How I’m Dealing With A Lack of Schedule
For the past few months, I have had complete freedom over my time. Before that time, I worked at a 9-6 job, with a boss, who told me what to do and when to have it done. My daily schedule was set in ritual during that time. I’d wake up at 6, meditate, make coffee, hit the gym, then head to work at 8:45. I’d leave worked at 6, cook, read, and bed at 10. No thought went into it; completely on autopilot and thus, it was very easy to maintain.
Now, I have complete freedom over my time. I am freelancing so besides showing up to film and meet clients, I can do my work whenever I want. Lately, that has led to me staying up really late because I waste a lot of my time, during the day so I force myself to finish the day’s work before I can go to bed. Although, I may be getting just as much work done, I doubt this is producing the best quality possible.
However, I’ve found it incredibly difficult to break this cycle. I am intrinsically motivated, but that doesn’t mean that I’m not still depleting my willpower by constantly choosing to work when I could just as easily not. It’s no longer on autoilot; choosing work is now simply an option of a way to spend my time.
Everyday, I am answering massive, existential questions (‘What is the point of finishing this?’ ‘Is this the best trajectory for my life?’). Questions that were a little more concealed when I was just following orders, clocking in / clocking out.
Although I am currently struggling to maintain ritual when I can work on whatever, whenever. I am, nonetheless, inspired by the notion that by analyzing everything I spend my time on, hopefully, the things that truly excite and motivate. Things that I have no choose, but to bring into the world.